Saboteur
by Shatteredsand
Summary: Because time had proven, again and again, that the mastermind needs her saboteur, if nothing else.
1. Saboteur

**AN: So I kinda love Nolan/Emily. Nemily? Emolan? Nomily? Still needs a ship name…obviously…But, the point is that I like the idea of them for no other reason than, well, that I do. Don't ask me to explain the inner workings of my mind. You won't like it.**

**Summary:** **Because time had proven, again and again, that the mastermind needs her saboteur, if nothing else.**

**Warnings: language**

**Disclaimer: I don't own "Revenge".**

**Saboteur**

Nolan isn't really sure if this is what David Clarke meant when he made him promise to look out for Amanda. In fact, he's pretty damn sure it's not. But here he is, walking down her path to vengeance without really thinking any of this through. And Nolan Ross always thinks things through. One hardly rises to the top of billion-dollar company by rushing headfirst into one's passing whims.

He's hacking databases that are so restricted he's looking at jail time just because he knows they _exist_. He's altering encrypted data and a changing people's whole worlds with a click of his mouse and tap of his keyboard, and this is not what he signed up for when Dave handed him an envelope and extracted a promise.

But every time he thinks about backing out, every time he even considers that maybe, just maybe, Emily can do this without him, she's calling him or he's calling her and it's abundantly clear that, no, she really can't. And, regardless of what he tells her, he's not sticking around out of a sick fascination with watching these Hampton blowhards get what's coming to them or because of a promise he made a long time ago to a man who isn't around to see it through.

No. Nolan is here, risking everything he's ever worked for, because Emily needs him to be there. And, sometimes, when she's been forced to admit that she needs him there, she'll look at him in just the right way. And it's beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. Untouchable, of course, because she's made herself hard and jaded and she's playing pretend with the pretty Grayson boy.

But it's that look that Nolan's living for. The one that says _I need you here, and more importantly, I _want_ you here_. It's not much. Especially considering the fact that she often tells him that she does not, in fact, want him around. But it's enough for now.

Enough to convince him to play saboteur to her mastermind. Enough to have him already working on procuring Jack and Declan as easy, ignorant foot soldiers. Because she's the general and he's the loyal lieutenant, but neither of them are strong enough to win this silent, unseen war alone. Emily may think she is, may deny him and his efforts to help until she literally can't anymore, but she's not. She needs him. She needs him and more besides, and if she won't ask for it, well, Nolan will just drop it off giftwrapped on her front porch and she can thank him later, after he's proven once more that everything he does is for her benefit and that, yes, he really is always right.

And after the war is done and won, Nolan allows himself the luxury of the thought that maybe he can start living up to his promise in a new way. One that maybe has Emily looking at him like she needs and wants him around without having their lives and/or freedom on the line. One where he buys an island somewhere and they run away to it and never look back at this horrible ugliness that is necessary in unspeakable ways.

Or maybe one where Emily Thorn, Amanda Clark, whatever the hell she wants to be called when all is said and done and dead, looks at Nolan Ross, or whatever unassuming alias he may or may not need to obtain after all is said and done and dead, like she loves him.

That last one being the one that really driving him, because Nolan's not sure when or where or how, but he's pretty sure that at some point the beguiling young woman had captured his heart and refused to release it, and he suddenly, unexpectedly, fell in love with her.

And that is the real reason he thinks David would be disappointed in him. Because he's not really keeping his promise at all. He's keeping a new one. In his beachfront mansion, surrounded by all the things wealth could by and not a single living soul, Nolan Ross sits in silence and makes a promise to himself that he will always protect and love Emily Thorn. Even when she thinks she doesn't want him to.

Because time had proven, again and again, that the mastermind needs her saboteur, if nothing else.


	2. Mastermind

**AN: So, I tried to leave this ship alone. And then couldn't. So, Chapter Two, anyone?**

**Warnings: None, except the amesome Nolan/Emily goodness. And if you didn't like that, well, you would be here. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own "Revenge".**

**Mastermind**

Emily wishes she didn't need Nolan. She had masterminded her revenge perfectly, every movement, every word. And nowhere in those plans had she ever considered Nolan Ross. And yet, time and time again, she found herself calling him or answering his call to her because something, somewhere, did not go according to plan and now she needed him. Again.

She had never accounted for his smug little smirks or his arrogant half-waves, but she found herself looking for them. She had never included his computer skills in her plotting, but she found herself relying on them. Relying on _him_.

And that is something she's always known she could never do. She couldn't trust Nolan. Couldn't trust _anyone_ but herself. Trust leads to betrayal, betrayal leads to failure, and she refuses to fail. But still, she calls, she answers, and she hasn't destroyed him yet. Can't destroy him, because she needs him.

Her perfect little saboteur.

And, somewhere in the back of her mind she wonders when she had started to think of him like that. Not as a tool to be used and tossed aside, but something that is _hers_. Something to be _kept_. Emily Thorne doesn't keep things. She ruins them. But _her_ saboteur is different. Off-limits. Safe. Something valued and protected.

She needs him, after all.

He's moving people in the abstract. Plotting along her schemes. Shifting the pieces on the board. Emily doesn't like it. It skews her plan, her supposed-to-be-but-not-quite perfect plan. It almost feels like he's sabotaging _her_. But she knows he isn't. She can see the spider web of lies and truths spinning out around him, ensnaring the could-of-been-should-of-been-_would_-have-been innocent. Drafting civilians into her private war. Enlisting them to fight for her cause the way he had volunteered. As if she needs more people involved, more people twisting the plan. The almost-but-not-really perfect plan.

She thinks she might have to kill him when all is said and done and dead. He knows far too much about everything she's never wanted known.

She thinks she'll have to let him live when all is said and done and dead….She can't imagine ending him.

She tries to think about a world where Nolan Ross does not exist. One where he doesn't call and she doesn't answer. A world where she calls tech support when she needs computer help. A world where she's never caught off guard by a blue-eyed, blonde nerd casually breaking into her house.

A world where she isn't a mastermind plotting the ruthless ending of a dozen people and he isn't her saboteur helping her in ways even she doesn't really know about.

She can't.

Her mind simply _refuses_ to process the idea. The very concept is wrong. Inconceivable. Blasphemous.

He is _her_ saboteur.

And she needs him. She really, really does. No matter how much she wants to refute it, how much she hates it. And she does. She really, really does. She doesn't want to need anyone. People are liabilities. People get in the way. People change the equation she'd thought perfectly balanced, make her realize that it had been flawed from the beginning.

Nolan changes the equation. Shifts the battle lines, makes them malleable. Sketched in sand rather than carved in stone.

And worse, sometimes, he looks at her just so. So soft and gentle. Longing and want etched in every line of his face.

Like she could be his world. Like he could love her, if she'd let him.

But she won't. She can't. She's far too damaged to love and be loved.

But she does need him. _Her_ saboteur, playing chess games on her board with her pieces. So when he calls, she knows she will answer. And when she needs to speak, to give voice to the planned plots and strategic schemes, she knows he will listen.

And if, sometimes, she catches herself returning his little looks, well, she _is_ only human at the end of the day. So, every once in a while, she tells him with her eyes, not her words, _never_ her words, that just maybe she's glad he signed up for her fight. Let him see, for just a second, that she _does_ need him.

But that's all she'll ever let it be.

Because Nolan is _her_ saboteur, but Emily isn't _his_ mastermind.

(The fact that she has to think to make the distinction is already proof that it isn't there at all.)

**AN2: Toying with the idea of doing more with this concept. Something like Daniel and Jack and Faux-Amanda's perspective on the Nolan/Emily friendship/partnership/relationship? Any takers? Let me know.**


End file.
